The shoes faced the outside of the house.
That was how my shoes were when I was leaving Natsumi and family's house.
The Japanese’s emphasis on hospitality goes to the extent of minor details. Most families will actually rearrange their guests' shoes when they are not noticing, to face the outside of the house neatly. So when their guests are leaving, they can easily slip into their shoes with comfort and ease. No words are exchanged, but from these gestures, I will always feel warm and welcomed. While that is the Japanese’s culture, they are not offended if Singaporeans do not do likewise.
We have our own ways of doing things, and it may not be the same as the Japanese's. Often these are habits that perpetuate though generations, and we pick up subconsciously from our society. Though the Singaporeans and Japanese are both Asians, our different backgrounds put us into different situations and mould us with different mindsets and habits. When one part of the world does it one way, but the other does another, it precipitates intercultural differences.
However, things can become tackier when we are unaware of certain etiquettes to abide by, which may mislead others to think that we are unprofessional or rude. On a study trip I went in China, seminars were scheduled to start at 8am. The Singaporean delegates usually gathered at 8am and prepared everything within 20 minutes. Since we had gotten our presentation materials prepared before the Chinese officials seemed to have settled down, we believed that everything was progressing fine.
Never did we expect that some Chinese officials were slightly disappointed by our time management. On the 3rd day, we were assembled in a classroom and were berated by an official from China’s Ministry of Education. At one point, we even had to repeat after him the time which he believed we should be ready. By stating 8am, he had expected materials to be ready at 8am exactly.
I was greatly taken aback. So were many other Singaporeans. The forceful manner which we were disciplined was slightly uncomfortable initially. This was especially when our concept of hierarchical back home, has increasingly been relaxed. Teachers and mentors seldom raise their voices, and if they did, most will actually apologise afterwards. Students are also given much freedom to voice or explain their opinions, instead of a one-way conveying of instructions.
However, we soon learnt that some of the officials from the education ministry, were previously from the Chinese military, and they were candidates which the government selected carefully into the job. In retrospect, I can understand the Chinese’s culture to embrace such manner of discipline and communication. It could be their way, at the nation's current phase of development, to manage a larger population and to ensure that plans can definitely be executed successfully.
Thus, we understood that the Chinese official had no malicious intent towards his guests from abroad. We adapted quickly to the situation, and did it how the Romans like it in Rome -- all materials were subsequently prepared by 7.50am.
There are various dimensions to intercultural differences. It seemed that if the more formal business norms are not observed, the implications may be quite severe. In formal settings, we can avoid unintended misunderstandings by clarifying with people who are more aware of the local culture. In less formal settings, we could usually close an eye to minor intercultural differences as we understand that everyone has their own culture of doing things. However, if we pay a little attention to what our foreign guests are usually doing, and reciprocate it in a similar manner, it might display our consideration and generosity, and thus further reduce the wall between individuals.
So, if we are staying in Japan and have guests over to our house, we might want to place their shoes to face the outside of the house too!
